strangers, new york, missed events

this was clever.

and improv everywhere does it again. awesome.

so just as soon as i was wrangled in to help at a lobster roll competition, my guy had to drop out because the folks at citi field didn't check the schedule before they committed and couldn't do it on a game night. but then, THEN, the chef says, "well the good news is that i've got an even better party for you on thursday! it's a cookbook release party for X and Y (major band) will be playing!" the problem with that: i'm already committed to a gala dinner on thursday with david. i'd agreed to take the place of the boyfriend he's just broken up with.

so yeah. no cookbook party madness for me. and for that, i am SAD. #whitewhine

i had a lovely weekend out in fire island with my gays. lots of lying by the pool. we've figured out accommodations for our field trip out to grey gardens (OMG! WE ARE GOING TO GREY GARDENS!) so many little things to do i can't even think straight. my personal planner looks like a pair of pencils went waltzing across it willy nilly. double and triple bookings 4 nights out of the week.

this is a screenshot of my statcounter the other day. BEST search to find my blog EVER. i like to think of this as being about an engagement to be married, not an engagement the english way which would just mean plans for dinner or whatever. but YES, googling something like that won't get you anywhere productive, hence how they ended up at my blog. AWESOME. i'm getting like 40 hits a day now about robinson cano. YES. I AM HIS GIRLFRIEND. WE ARE IN LOVE. I'M HAVING HIS BABIES. the thing is that i've had my eye on that guy for at least 4 years. i've been talking about how hot he is long before anyone knew who he was. but now, NOW he's a fucking hot shot so everybody is trying to get in on this. they need to BACK OFF. srsly.

i got in the elevator heading up to pilates and a man jumped in as the doors were sliding shut. he goes to push a button and retreats. he's obviously not going to pilates. i see him looking at me, "are you running late to class?" i wasn't. "oh, i didn't want to hold you up! i'd have rode up with you and then taken it back down to my floor." which, honestly, was pretty much the best random act of kindness from a stranger i've had in weeks. this elevator is ancient and takes FOREVER and he was volunteering to bypass his floor so that i could get to pilates on time? unbelievable.

i was on the subway uptown and some woman sits next to me and i can see her staring at me. i'm thinking, "what the F did i do to this woman?" because in new york, when someone is annoying you, you give them dirty looks. so i brush my hair behind my ear and i hear her say, "no! don't do that." i turn to look at her to see whether she's talking to me and she is. "it looks more chic down. don't tuck behind." YES. some woman on the train yelled at me for tucking my hair behind my ears. it's zeki, my old stylist, reincarnated as a small latina woman who looks like she works the perfume counter at bloomingdales. i untucked my hair and she nodded in approval. i thanked her and then we both went back to minding our own business. 

only in new york kids, only in new york.