Monday, November 07, 2005

i heart chefs

a while back jamie oliver was cooking at the restaurant where i worked. he had flown in a staff to work with him. among them was J, an irish boy (seriously, he was so young i didn't want to even ask how old he was so i don't quite know the extent of it) with red hair and freckles who was a good friend of jamie's and a pastry chef. J and i chatted during the evening. i helped him settle his nerves when he thought his tortes might not be finished by the time the dessert courses needed to be out. i met them all out at a club down the street afterwards and we made out like high schoolers (actually, it probably felt that way because he quite possibly could have been a high schooler) but it was sweet anyways. he works at some uber fancy restaurant somewhere in CA but he texts (ugh. texts from boys...ugh...) me randomly every couple months.

last month he texted to say he was going to be in NYC and that he hates going out to eat alone and would i like to join him? being the jamie oliver fanatic that i am (he's back here to work with jamie again and i can pray i'll get to hang with them) and also a big fan of free food, of course i told him i'd love to.

he got here tonight and i got these texts (broken into pieces because verizon texts have a max letter limit):
i am staying with a friend of a friend in queens for a few nights which is good but he is painting the house and the smell is really strong so i must get some
i had to laugh out loud at this one. i knew there was another text coming, but it sounded so funny just left alone like that. like, "i need to get out of house, wanna fuck?"
accommodation tomorrow or wed. i will be working thur and fri but have dinner reservations on sat and sun.

so up front, he's obviously hinting a stay at my place. this will not happen. i've met him once and he didn't get past first base. he's crazy for thinking he's coming back to mine. but the real question is...what are the chances that dinner hinges on me getting this kid a bed to sleep on? i know he'll be hooked up with some totally fat (phat?) restaurants as he's pals with jamie and mario (batali). will need to do some crafty maneuvering here.

any suggestions?

22 people who played with me:

Blogger Syar said...

I can't believe you got me for a first comment on a post about sex and boys.

I apologize profusely.

all I can say is...tell me how it goes, so I can file it away under "Tricks To Use When You Finally Reach Legal Age". oh, and I heart jamie oliver too.

11/08/2005 12:33 AM  
Blogger R. U. Serious said...

So, what you are saying is that paint smell is not enough to get you laid?

What if the toilet was stopped up?

11/08/2005 12:52 AM  
Blogger Gloria Glo said...

My morals dry up quick when the word 'restaurant' gets bandied about....but is it so hard to find him a bed to sleep on? I mean, I see the dilemma of finding him both a bed to sleep in AND a companion, but come on...small price to pay for AMAZING food!

11/08/2005 1:02 AM  
Blogger iluvnyc said...

wow... that man is so sure you'll take him back huh?.... will you?

11/08/2005 4:54 AM  
Blogger AM said...

Tell him your flat's being done up and painted too?

11/08/2005 8:47 AM  
Blogger omar said...

A pastry chef?! They make chefs that specialize in pastries? Woman, why are you hesitating?

11/08/2005 9:03 AM  
Blogger Ale said...

OH YOU SUCK!!!!! :) i can't believe you met jamie oliver- what a sex pot he is! too bad he's married- i want to meet dave leiberman... can you hook it up!?

ps- dont be too hard on the irish tart boy- he may not have been hinting at staying at your place- maybe he is getting a hotel room.

i like him for you! chefs are HOT- pastry chefs-- ohhhh!

11/08/2005 10:20 AM  
Blogger stretch td said...

If he's looking for sex for dinner reservations, is he worth it. Tell him to let you know where he is crashing and hope to see him. Thats the only way you'll find out his true intentions.

Saw Mario today on his mint green Vespa ... hope you don't think his shorts and orange slippers are sexy.

11/08/2005 10:22 AM  
Blogger Ale said...

oh... and does jaimie oliver really cool in the nude?? :)

11/08/2005 10:23 AM  
Blogger omar said...

You think you could introduce me to Giada De Laurentiis, with your chef hook-ups?

11/08/2005 11:43 AM  
Blogger Katie said...

Alton Brown? How about Alton Brown? (Whoa, some of my nerd showing through, sorry, I'll try to cover it up next time.) Yay for dinner! You should go with him and continue to have your sex drive turned off. Free dinner, and amusement to boot.

11/08/2005 12:52 PM  
Blogger piu piu said...

let him sleep on the floor and take u to a restaurant

11/08/2005 12:59 PM  
Blogger 1 said...

sex for food is always a "good thing"...damn, I promised never to quote her again. It just seemed so fitting.

11/08/2005 1:44 PM  
Blogger Former Intern Andy said...

I think you should let him stay onthe floor. At least it will give you some feeling for what it will be like when I need a place to crash the next time I'm in NY. :)

11/08/2005 5:21 PM  
Blogger cadiz12 said...

sounds like he's not expecting, but maybe hoping, at least for a spot on the floor. just be upfront about what you will and will not put up with. have fun!

11/08/2005 5:31 PM  
Blogger Andy said...

This is obvious

"Gee I'd love to let you crash at my place but one of my roommates is crazy about having overnight guests"

or

"Gee I'd love to let you crash at my place but I already have a friend staying here - there just isn't space."

or

"Hey Andy, I found an apartment for you and it's in an awesome location and it's cheap. You move in this weekend."

That last one would be strictly for my benefit.gaobtu.

11/08/2005 5:52 PM  
Blogger The Seeker said...

Unless he's a total dork, sleep with him... you might even enjoy it more than the food.

11/08/2005 11:29 PM  
Blogger Me said...

I'd say save some money and enjoy the food. Let him sleep on the floor. With him working Thurs and Friday, that shouldn't be too much of a problem assuming he'll be out late.

If he wants to do something and you don't, you can always pull that annoying "Oh, gee, I'm so tired" *yawn* shit.

If it sucks, just don't let him stay next time he's in town. If not, it could be fun ;)

11/09/2005 5:01 AM  
Blogger mrsmogul said...

I say let him stay with you!!! You know he's normal and not a maniac and you will get in the Jamie Oliver crowd. Jamie's on tv here all the time. He helped with the school lunches here. I just read his wife's book.

11/09/2005 2:30 PM  
Blogger marriedman said...

my suggestion is this:

1. take off your clothes
2. hop on a plane (this of course will be easy, as you will be naked and they wont need you to strip down)
3. Come to my work
4. Climb on to my desk
5. And work out all of your sexual frustration.

works every time.

11/09/2005 7:02 PM  
Blogger Jodes said...

very cool way of taking the pic

11/10/2005 10:25 AM  
Blogger robmcj said...

Mrs Mogul is right. I'm sure you've noticed by now, Jamie's wife is a miserable complaining git, it'll never last. I was going to advise you to wait till he sees sense, but by then he may already be with someone else. Better make your move now. I can do you a character reference if it helps.

11/14/2005 5:29 PM  

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