So today was another one of those days that screams to me I’d be crazy to leave new york. I know there were several of you telling me not to go to D.C., that nyc was better. Well, I’m fully aware. If I were to go, it wouldn’t be for the scenery or the social scene. it would be for a dream job in politics. It’s a sacrifice, I’m not sure I’m ready to make it, I have to decide soon, I hate being so confused about it all, and most of all I hate making hard decisions. I’m lazy, I’m scared, i’m clueless. I’ll figure it out, not because I want to, but because I have to. there are a lot of factors, a few of which concern an apartment full of furniture, a lease that ends aug. 27th, and the bar which keeps me from getting anything accomplished until the beginning of august. As if the bar exam weren’t stressful or scary enough I’ve gotta be verging on homelessness and joblessness at the same time. Moving to d.c. involves the messiness of either moving there with no job (not recommended), or getting a place month to month here (and I suppose putting all my furniture in storage?) and waiting till I get the call to move. Oy! Enough with my serious stuff. It just helped to get it down.
So people may think it’s sad, but the people at my starbucks are starting to learn my name. they usually recognize who I am by sight, and what I drink, but today the girl behind the register said, “hey, can you hand that iced tea to jasmine?” and though there were women on each side, the barrista knew which one was me. Made me feel at home, in a sad, “she’s here all the time and we feel sorry for her” kind of way.
With my venti unsweetened black iced tea (light ice) in hand, I head to the park planning to read my New Yorker at the meadow. This, my dears, is my dream day-off activity. I’m boring, but happy. I pass by the softball fields and remember it’s a Thursday. And summer Thursdays in glorious new york city mean broadway show league games!! I’d nearly forgotten all about this virtually unknown new york treasure. Most the broadway shows get together their own softball teams and they play against each other. I missed the 11:30 round of games so I have yet to see if Denzel Washington is playing for the Julius Caesar team. I will keep you posted, although, if I see Denzel I may just jump him, which may get me arrested. I will keep you posted if there is internet access from jail. I know a guy who works for blue man group and i saw him in the outfield for their team so watched that game for the afternoon.
There is a guy who plays the soprano sax (which I love) on the corner of my block. he’s one of the few street musicians that can play jazz with a little soul. He doesn’t play all the lame standards either (how many times does one have to hear Brubeck's take five, really). He plays the stuff that jazz lovers like. I left him a five today, just because.
17 people who played with me:
don't feel bad about buddying up with the baristas; there's something beautiful about being a regular. who knows, you could find a niche just as comfy in d.c. and if you don't, you can always come back, right? just get your street sax's name so you can brag about knowing him way back when if he makes it big.
i don't envy your decision, though.
(btw, if you see denzel will you please blow 17 kisses his way from me?)
It's the same thing I went through when deciding to go to NY (even if only temporarily), although yours carries a bit more weight, I think. Still, it was scary as hell coming to the city, not knowing anyone. For me, it was a big change.
Anyway, don't let anything stand in the way of a promising career. There's time for love and marriage (*cough* ours *cough*) later. Think of it as an adventure. That's what I did. I guess just make sure it's what you need to do to be happy professionally.
hey jasmine,
Just look at the bigger picture and ul find detaching a simpler process.....hope it goes well for you.
P.S - Hope u dont mind me linking you.
Hi Jazz!
Nice post...great read. It's like I hung out at the park with you. I miss NY!! :-(
hey, I LOVE DC, i lived there for a few months and the barista recognition time is MUCH shorter there--- they'll know your name the second time you show up-
but don't listen to me, i do NOT like NY (said as elegantly as possible) so maybe any place outside of it seems like a paradise.
I think DC is beautiful and people are nice and ready to make friends (since many are from out of state) PLUS as you mentioned you have a sign on you head that reads "for a good time talk to jasmine" than for you especially it will be no sweat to find a fun group of cute people to call your own!!
oh and.... don't tell anyone, but there is no "city tax" that will be taken out of your paycheck!
I don't know...from reading this much of your blog.... seems as thought NY fits you. or do you fit NY...
Nothing wrong with making friends with baristas. I always seem to befriend them wherever I'm working, maybe it's the desparate look on my face in the morning as I ask for my fix, "Give me my cappuccino! Gimme gimme so I can be human again."
Can't claim to know much about the NY/DC comparison. I have been told to consider colleges in or near D.C. for public policy but damned if I know anything about it yet.
I was a *somewhat* similar situation five years back and I would agree with super andy, thinking of it as an adventure helped.
Good luck and the best of wishes.
Oh and ever went somewhere with an intention to order something different and had your regular drink placed in your face the second you sat down? :/
Leaving college was the most terrifying moment of my life. I had been successful during my years there and suddenly I had to find a whole new world. The world had never felt so big and foreign - I barely knew who I was, let alone where I belonged in such a crazy place.
I don't know if there is a 'perfect' choice, but wherever you choose will help you to grow. That's cheesy, but I've found it to be true.
That said, I could never choose between DC and NY. I love them both (although I've never lived in either). My bro lived in the DC area and he called it "crazy", which is exactly what my cousin said of NY. So, nope, I can be of absolutely no help.
To be known in a relatively large city like NY (relative to what, I don't know) must give some credence to the idea that you stick out somewhat. I live in a small city (in comparison) and my local coffee joint punters don't know me from the latte in their hand...
You know what, J? Who cares? You can always change your mind. So go to DC. If it's not going as you like in a year, you can move back to New York.
But if you stay in New York, you'd always wonder if you shoulda/coulda/woulda been better off in DC.
I always say you should start with the one with more to offer, scarier, and least likely to be enjoyable, 'cos then you always have your favourite option to fall back on.
It's really not the end of the world. It just feels like it. :) It's so scary, picking up and going, but you're gonna really feel excited once the wheels get rolling.
-s.
thelastditch.blogspot.com
My friend from DC says everyone there is arab or gay? I was there when I was little so don't remember.
I feel great when people know me. I am such a small town girl! What fun to kick back and watch the games. If you jump Denzel, I won't hate you!
I am a boring but happy person as well. A level of humdrum keeps me on an even keel. I do add flavor very often, as I can tell you do.
Happy Monday! (Okay- not!) Stressful things- moving and job changes. Good luck!!
Amber Lynn
Nice post. Takes me back....definitely.
I've noticed you either love NYC and couldn't possibly imagine life anywhere else, or you fucking hate it: the crowds, the attitudes, etc.
I can tell you love it and I think things wouldn't be the same in DC.
Good luck with your decision Jazz.
I used to be a barista. I figured "Hey, if we're making that much money on flavored hot water, I want in on the action." I never thought people were pathetic when they became regulars. Quite the contrary, actually. It came to be that I looked forward to seeing the regulars and missed them when they didn't come in. We had the Brazillian girl who tried to get me to speak Portuguese, even though it's been 15 years since I've been to Brazil. There was the timid teacher who would write in her journal in the corner. There were many more, and it was always good to see them.
To think...you're making people's days brighter just by buying an overpriced cup of coffee...
You are free to come and go as you damn please. NY will call you back and forth and you will answer when you need to.
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