Thursday, March 15, 2007

why i'm going to hell part 1: in which i call a spade a spade

i get on the bus and sit in one of the front seats marked "please give up this seat for the elderly or handicapped." a woman steps into the bus behind me and stands up near the front. she looks late 50's, i.e. not old enough for people to get up to offer her their seats.

the woman next to me, who is OBESE (taking up two whole seats obese, i'm surprised she's at all able to walk) starts talking to me.

"according to the americans with disabilities act, these front seats are only to be used by the elderly or the disabled."

i glance at her to see whether she's talking to me. it looks like she is. i consider, for a moment, whether i care to to respond. i decide i don't.

she continues, "so you're not supposed to be sitting in this seat!"

i give her a dirty look, see she's looking at the standing woman. annoyed, but feeling a little guilty, i ask whether said standing woman wants my seat. standing woman responds, "oh gosh no! i'm only going a couple stops." and she honestly looks annoyed that i perceived her as being too old to be able to stand for 5 minutes on a bus.

i shoot the obese woman another look that says, "so there!"

and then i get nasty. my next line to her: "so because you don't know when to stop eating like a normal person, you call yourself disabled? and then walk around self-righteously lecturing people all day? get a life lady."

and with that, the bus rolled to a stop at my street and i happily went on my way.

3 people who played with me:

Blogger piu piu said...


i love that so much

3/15/2007 11:11 AM  
Blogger The Stormin Mormon said...

What a bitch...

Her, not you.

Well, I'm sure that you can be bitchy if you need to, but that instance was not being bitchy.

3/15/2007 8:12 PM  
Blogger Syar said...

I think you were right in your opinion, but I'm scared for you now. Karma's a bitch. She may not be an obese bitch, but still a bitch.

(Oh, I just thought of another comeback : "If you were so concerned, why didn't your left butt cheek offer the woman a damn seat?" BURN!)

Save me a seat in Hell, Jazz.

3/16/2007 1:08 AM  

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