Tuesday, October 27, 2009

jury duty

there were lots of people sleeping. a name gets called like once ever 45 minutes, it's never mine.

there's a gaysian sitting next to me. he's so old he uses AOL. and i keep hearing the "you've got mail!" announcement which means he's probably also too old to know how to turn off the volume on his laptop. but YAY for getting to use laptops at jury duty! he's wearing a french blue oxford and red capri pants. he types, loudly, with two fingers and i just glanced at his screen and it said, "That us utterly utterly divine!" so basically he's a caricature of himself. then he e-mailed an ebay member with a story about katie being in the hospital and mary chasing all the reporters away to sit with her. this is all strange but now i'm kind of obsessed with him. he's looking up mademoiselle fifi on imdb. this guy is hilarious.

where i had lunch. had banh mi and a shaved ice drink with coconut milk and red bean and some green jelly thing that i didn't love...may do dumplings and bubble tea tomorrow!

got let out at 3:30, did some damage in soho after getting a ginger citrus iced tea at the balthazar bakery and then met the boys for some drinking and sausages and sauerkraut. 

day two is rocking so far. didn't have to report till 10:30 so i went to breakfast at balthazar for a bowl of skim latte and eggs benny, my favorite weekday morning spot in the city. exchanged some boots at steven (one was squeaky) AND got an extra set of house keys made and made it here just in time to yell "HERE!" at roll call. 
lunch was dumplings and bubble tea with a nice long sit in columbus park, which may be my new favorite place. it reminded me of washington heights in that everyone was just hanging around and seemed to know each other and were playing with cards or tiles. except for the fact it was mah jong instead of dominoes and they were chinese instead of dominican. but the feel was the same. people taking time to enjoy one another's company. the weather was beautiful. a bunch of guys were playing football in an fenced in grassy field. there was a man behind me sitting on a rock, carrying a covered birdcage. he gingerly pulled the fabric off to reveal a gorgeous, large, creamy yellow bird with distinctive markings around his eyes in a gorgeous wooden, delicate-looking cage. he blew on this tiny little silver whistle and the bird, i swear, was speaking back to him. i, honest to god, think they were having a conversation. it was mezmerizing. ladies with paper parisols. just gorgeous.

back inside i got called to a courtroom. my name was drawn from a box and i was in the jury box answering the voir dire questions. defendant was HOT. like, distractingly good looking. was selling drugs, in jail which i thought was kind of resourceful of him. i asked what kind of drugs when the prosecutor said, "we can all agree that illegal drugs are harmful, right?" i thought 1.) leading questions! and 2.) but not if it's just pot! he said "crack cocaine" as an example of a drug which i then agreed with him was harmful. my brother has been convicted of drug possession and i was pretty nonchalant about it so that wasn't working in my favor either as a potential juror. and i did get excused that day. 4 black ladies in front of me were trying to get out of serving. first complained about the timing (trial was the following monday and tuesday) but the judge didn't excuse them. then when the judge asked if anyone had any moral or religious issues with judging people (i.e. jehova's witnesses! come on down!) the ladies got up and all told the judge that they could not convict a fellow black person. once the judge let them go, the rest of the black people in the room did the same thing and the only jurors left were a bunch of white people (many of them bankers who seemed to still have their jobs) with a few asians and latinos thrown in for good measure. so much for a jury of your peers.

1 people who played with me:

Blogger Cousin said...

"he's so old he uses AOL."

That hurt.

I'm told a sure way to get out of jury duty is to utter the words "Fully Infomred Jury Amendment." Though if you're a lawyer, I wonder if it would get you disbarred.

10/27/2009 9:10 PM  

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